The Wedding Guild Series: Raise a Glass
Raising a glass to the new Mr. & Mrs. is always an exciting moment as clinking those glasses together signifies that you’re wishing the couple a happy, healthy life and congratulating them on their new adventure together! But where did this tradition come from?
The clinking of the glasses started as a ritual to turn away any evil spirits that might bring bad vibes to the couple. Toasts were (and still are) meant to unite everyone in a joyous occasion full of well-wishes.
If you’ve been asked to provide a toast or you’re considering who to ask, the following tips and key points will lead you to toasting success.
WHO SHOULD TOAST?
Traditionally the event host(s), best man, and the maid of honor should be invited to toast the couple at the wedding reception. Additional speeches should be given at the rehearsal dinner.
WHEN ARE TOASTS CONSIDERED APPROPRIATE?
Toasts may be scheduled before, during or after dinner. However, be sure to consider the tone a toast may set for a specific moment and plug it into the event timeline accordingly.
Rehearsal Dinner Toasts- Having toasts at the rehearsal dinner is a great way to offer friends and family who won’t be asked to speak at the wedding an opportunity to share their words of goodwill. Typically, the guests attending the rehearsal dinner have close relationships with the couple, which can make the toasts more private and offer an intimate experience. The hosts of the rehearsal dinner, traditionally the parents of the groom, should also say a few words at the beginning of the event to kick off the festivities.
Wedding Day Toasts- Traditionally the Maid of Honor, Best Man and hosts, customarily the Father of the Bride, provide toasts on the wedding day. MLE recommends having the Father of the Bride toast the happy couple immediately following the seating of guests, prior to the start of dinner service. Offering a toast at this point in the event is also a great way to gather everyone’s attention with the least amount of distractions and there is less background noise.
The Best Man and Maid of Honor are welcome to follow the first speech but generally, MLE recommends saving their toasts for a later point in the event. Guests are typically anxious for dinner service to start and begin to lose interest.
MLE typically leverages the Best Man and Maid of Honor speeches after dinner has concluded, followed by the cutting of the wedding cake. Placing these toasts at this point in the event timeline offers a smooth transition from dinner to reception.
WHAT TO AVOID:
Having too many toasts- MLE recommends a three-toast maximum. Beyond that, guests grow restless and aren’t willing to pay close attention. Being concise and direct is key. Speakers should prepare in advance and know what they plan to say.
Toasts that are too long- Toasts shouldn’t exceed five minutes otherwise guests start to lose interest. MLE recommends three minutes as we have found this length of time to be both adequate and to the point without boring guests.
Open Mics- Never have an open mic! Having an open mic presents opportunities for any guest to give a toast, most of which are spontaneous speeches. While spontaneity can be fun, it’s not generally appropriate at a formal event such as a wedding reception. Furthermore, an open mic is especially risky when guests have been consuming alcohol and speaking unprepared.
MLE TIPS FOR A GOOD TOAST:
Toasts can be a positive, uplifting addition to any celebration when executed well. Here are some tips to help you if you’ve been asked to provide a toast at an upcoming event:
Practice your speech out loud with a small audience beforehand. Outside sources are very helpful when it comes to providing feedback regarding the flow of your speech.
Set a time limit and don’t exceed it (three minutes is ideal).
Briefly introduce yourself and explain how you know the person(s) you’re toasting.
If toasting a bride, groom, or couple, expand on the time you met their significant other and what you love about their partner.
Make sure the content of your speech is audience-appropriate.
Be prepared by having a glass in hand to raise at the end of your toast.
Don’t forget to ask the audience to “raise a glass”.
Make sure to toast the couple a long and happy future together.
Have fun with it!
Toasts can be such a noteworthy part of any event and offer some really great memories for the person(s) being toasted. Following the tips above and being selective about who you ask to prepare toasts will ensure a great experience for all involved.
Cheers!
